The narrative continued, though with no additional pictures. “When he barks, talk radio hosts listen!”
A pause for effect and, “When playing fetch, he throws the stick”
The background music swelled. “He is—the most interesting dog in the world.” The words faded as did the image. The living room lights were restored.
The dog sitting next to me applauded profusely. “Bravo! Bravo! More! More!”
“I have to admit, it was stirring. Only one thing.”
“An artist is always open to constructive suggestions,” my Corgi allowed.
“How does this promote sales of my book, The Five Names?”
My pet turned away. “Is it suppertime?”
“Carl!” He slowly turned back to me. “I would have thought it was apparent.”
“All right, I’ll explain. You see the nuclear explosion would have killed most dogs, and earthquakes have been know to swallow pets whole, and the talk radio hosts are always talking instead of reading your book, and the fetch thing—well now that’s clearly a metaphor.”
I wasn’t buying a word of Carl’s explanation, but I didn’t want to confront him. I suggested, “What if we insert the line, ‘He enjoys reading books by the soon-to-be-famous-author, Robert Hansen,’ Then finish with, ‘He is—the most interesting dog in the world.’”
Carl thought for a moment, then replied, “It takes away a bit of the zip, but I guess it will work.”