The Carl Report—What People Want to Nose.
First I would like to explain what might have appeared to be an abrupt ending to my last report. I didn’t want my ailment to be made public, but apparently I have little choice. I suffer from a condition called, Canine Biscitus. It’s not life threatening and 99% of the time I appear to be a normal dog. It’s that 1%, when the fever hits me and my nerves explode with lightening energy and—too much said.
In regards to my scathing interview with well-known author, Robert Hansen, it was later that day when I continued with my questions: “So, how many dogs would you say are characters in your book, The Five Names?”
“And, of that number, how many are Corgies?”
“All of that number.”
“Every one?” “Yes.”
“Ah ha! I have you now! You admitted that the number was zero. You used zero dog characters in your book, even though you have a wonderful pet of the Corgi persuasion who would have made a wonderful character, How could you not think of me—I mean think of Carl when writing the book? You wound me—I mean you damage Carl. How can I live with my pain?”
“Carl, you do realize that I wrote the manuscript some fifteen years ago, don’t you?”
“Well, of course I know that—I think. Is that in people years?”
“Yes, so I wrote it long before you were born.”