Anaconda

Carl here. I’m certain you’re curious about this photo. This is my humble story: All Corgis are brave, but we don’t take advantage of that fact. In other words, we never go looking for a fight. So, when I happened upon a fifty-foot, banana anaconda near the house, my first instinct was to reason with the brute. “See here,” I said, “Why don’t you move along. Find someplace where your dastardly-evil, snake ways are appreciated.”

The creature hissed as its body slithered to encircle me.

“Last warning!”

It spit liquid at me—obviously poisonous.

 “I’ve given you fair notice!” I sprang into action, bounding toward its head. I bit into the black ear on the right side of its face.

From the beast gushed a full killing stream.

I went for the neck, just below its head. Oddly the non-yellow skin tasted like metal. I clamped down as the snake thrashed and whipped. I feared I would be flung far, but I focused on protecting my human family, including Robert Hansen, the author of The Five Names.

Finally, the creature’s strength waned. It wiggled weakly, then became motionless.

I don’t encounter banana anacondas every day. Often the threat comes from bears, or turtles, or tele-marketers. But, regardless the specific type of danger, C-dog is on duty, preserving the household.