Rock Music


Carl is obsessed. He works day and night on the musical score for the movie version of my novel, The Five Names. All the while he maintains his happy-go-lucky smile. How does he do it? “Pace yourself,” I told him.

He responded with a brief pause and a far-away look. “This is far bigger than I anticipated. It’s developing into a musical, a rock musical.”

“I never thought of Inkie being into rock.”

“Have you forgotten what you wrote?”

“It’s been known to happen. But I’ve worked the manuscript over so many times that it’s hard to imagine I wouldn’t recall….”

“I offer my rendition of the prime example of a rock song.” Carl barked out a drum beat, and then mimicked a guitar. Then he howled out the words:

Rock in the bucket,

Rock in the bucket,

I must get them all,

Big ones, small one,

Carry them over,

Put them on the wall.

I was astonished. “A real rock song, a song about rocks. Carl, you have one-upped me. But that hardly justifies the movie being turned into a musical.”

“You say that because you have forgotten the secret, hidden-in-the-lyrics code. First of all, the song is recorded on page nine of the novel. Now, if we take that number and divide it by the twenty-five words in the song and multiply that product by the twenty-fifth ascending prime number subsequent to the number three. Then divide that by the circumference of the moon, Titan, we soon see that there are exactly seventeen songs hidden in the novel—thus the need of the musical format. You’re with me, aren’t you?”

There are times in a person’s life when diversion is the best strategy. “Carl, how would you like a premium doggy biscuit?”


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1 Response to Rock Music

  1. I think Carl’s on to something here.

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